"confessions"

Moving to the New Studio

After 3 and a half years years I am finally in my new studio. I went back and checked, it was March of 2021 that I first spoke about getting this studio space. It was a much delayed renovation (for so many reasons) but we are in the space. Big sigh! Not sure if it is a sigh of relief for me just yet, but it will come.

Over the years I have sewn at 3 different dining room tables, in my bedroom, in a few different basements in various states of being, in a closet once, and most recently (for the last decade) in a dedicated sewing room at home. Every single space has been a place of creativity and challenge. All I really cared about was that I could sew and I made any space work. What all those spots had in common, though, was that they were at home. This is my first time with a space outside of the home.

The goal for this space is twofold. One, I will have my own creative space for sewing and creating. It is much larger than anything I’ve had before with excellent storage and good lighting. Two, I will be able to both host small classes and film classes here. So, personal and professional opportunities.

Two vintage wood chairs with colourful cushions
Wood kitchen island with open shelves filled with fabric bins and baskets ready for sewing

My personal space is quite lovely. Open with a lot of room. I’m still missing an actual desk, but it is coming. Of course I set up my sewing table first! After a few days of moving and not sewing I was getting antsy. I’ve more or less set it up exactly as I did at home. It works well for me, this standing configuration.

It is a treat to set up a little sitting area. Technically, I had this in my sewing room at home because it was also our guest room and there was a couch in it. Not surprisingly, it was covered with stuff (quilts, quilt tops, blocks, fabric) most of the time so sitting on it wasn’t always an option. I’m hoping for generous cups of tea and visit with friends here. The chairs themselves came from a friend of mine. She and her family were moving away and leaving furniture behind. These chairs were her grandmother’s. I got new cushions made for them from fabric collected over the years (like hemming pants, cushion covers are not in my wheel house most of the time.)

Since the initial planning I knew I was saving this blank wall to be a giant design wall. I’m nearly finished making it and just have to install it. Folks, it is massive. I am so excited. For me, yes, but also when I am teaching. Having been in so many spaces for classes over the years I know how creative we quilters have to get when it comes to design walls. This is going to help so much.

As much as I am thrilled to have this new space for me, let’s be honest, it isn’t just for me. My son is doing online school in the mornings here. He is transitioning to full time school after missing most of the last 2 years with Long Covid. Then, because the house is now empty in the mornings the dog also comes with us. I won’t lie, this presents a challenge. It isn’t exactly the quiet space I would have hoped for. At least not in the mornings! Maybe that actually helps me with the transition out of the home though? Bring some more of home here so it doesn’t feel weird?

A white dog, a desk, and small kitchen unit

True confession time: this is weird. I am feeling rather discombobulated still. There was the stress of all the moving (and the resulting chaos left at home) and adjusting to change. That’s going to take some time to resolve, I think. Then there is the impact on my schedule. I haven’t had to be up and out of the house in a long time. Plus, I am used to throwing a load of laundry in or getting dinner started in the middle of the day. I had my multitasking game down pat! Truthfully, though, I was doing more of the home/mother stuff and very little of the work stuff these last few years. It was what was required for our family but it sure was frustrating for me. Finally, I’ve worked hard to compartmentalize my life since joining the family business. This new studio space is connected to our office/workshop space. That means I can be interrupted at any time with accounting or strategy questions. I can also pop back and forth between my own quilting work or writing and the family business. My head is spinning somedays! I really liked home is home and work is work. Now it is all jumbled.

Time, I need time. Change isn’t always easy, even if it is the right thing to do. I miss hearing the birds in the background or the noises of residential life. Now I have trains on the regular, power tools, and our employees on their lunch break. That being said, I have the wide open space and opportunity plus excellent storage (as soon as all the shelves are up). Nothing is ever going to be perfect, but it sure can be good.

Perimenopause Chronicle Quilt Update

Perimenopause Chronicle Quilt Cheryl Arkison

One month in.

I’ve never paid this much attention to my menstrual cycle. I’m finding it quite eye opening. Part of it is about deciphering whether a mood is as result of outside forces (life/Covid/work/parenting) or influenced by hormones and impacting my responses to those outside forces. Part of it is realizing how much my sleep, or lack thereof, is both impacted by perimenopause and impacts my moods. Frankly, it all has me appreciating just how much we women can get done with all this happening to our bodies.

Cheryl Arkison Mittelschmerz.jpg

The project itself involves 5-10 minutes of sewing at the end of the day. After the kids go to bed and before I sit down with my husband I stitch up the block. Pain? Mood? Any flow? What about all that other random stuff? Pain (associated with my cycle only, not my back pain) is a strike through the center of the vagina representation. The background is the mood. The center is about flow or not flow. Orange bits account for the night time stuff (sweats and dreams) or bowel, breast, or other things. In the first month I marked my Covid vaccine. In this second month I marked my restart of iron supplements for anemia. Each night I post the block and quick summary on my Instagram stories. #perimenipausechroniclequilt

I am wildly curious to see consistencies and changes over the year. Sure, I could use an app like my teenage daughter, but this visual representation is very appealing to me. Here is the legend I am using.

Only one person has criticized me for the project, for sharing too much information. While I get that - this is a lot for me to be sharing, I’m sure my teenage nephews that follow me love it - I really do believe that it is important to be open in this conversation. After I first announced the project I received so many positive emails from women of all ages. I really appreciate every comment, it adds to the conversation. If the emails and comments are any indication, we need to have more and more conversations.

Perimenopause Chronicle Quilt Cheryl Arkison

The Perimenopause Chronicle Quilt Begins

Perimenopause Chronical Quilt

I come from a family with scary uterine history. My grandmother died of cervical cancer in her 30s. My mom had a hysterectomy shortly after giving birth to me. That history also means I have zero recollection of any conversations about menopause within my family. Really though, the world just doesn’t talk it; it isn’t just a thing with my family. More specifically, the world does not talk about perimenopause.

A few weeks ago I had a long conversation with one of my girlfriends about this. Is it squeamishness? Denial? the perpetual sweeping under the rug of anything to do with women’s health? Now that we are in the thick of perimenopause it reminds of when I was pregnant and I kept asking: why didn’t anyone tell me about this? In both cases it might be that people did tell me but I wasn’t looking for/listening to the information before I needed it. Or, it is the reasons listed above? Regardless, I am interested in it a lot now, for obvious reasons - being a 45 year old woman, namely.

So, on our last Virtual Trunk Show (Instagram Live, the second Thursday of each month) we had the theme of Change of Seasons and it gave me a wonderful idea: make a quilt to mark the perimenopause experience! I got the idea from the concept of temperature quilts/blankets. You pick a colour to correspond with the temperature of the day and make a block or knit/crochet a row to mark it. Only I would be marking my flow, moods, pain, and other stuff of my perimenopausal menstrual cycle.

Aided by a few conversations with friends and online about what exactly I should track and in consultation with the Monster and The Evil Genius I planned out the quilt. Fabric selection was a bit tough. I went back and forth between solids and prints until I concluded that neither felt right. A quiet Sunday at home led me to experiment with hand-dyed fabric (with Procion MX dyes). It took a few tries but I am happy with the palette for this quilt.

Cheryl Arkison Perimenopause Chronicle Quilt

Each block will include a representation of my flow, or not flow, as well as my mood. I am also including a marker for pain and for what my teen referred to as Random Ass Shit like night sweats, bowel issues, breast tenderness, and bloating.

Here is the legend I am working with:

LEFT PILE
Orange = Random Ass Shit
Yellow = Pain (cramps and mittleschmerz mostly)
Pink/Peach = no flow
Pink Red = light flow
Red = medium flow
Purple Red = heavy flow

RIGHT PILE is for moods
Green = Happy
Turquoise = Content
Blue = Sad/Listless
Purple = Grumpy/Irritable/Annoyed
Black = Angry

My plan is to track things for 12 cycles. That adds up to more or less a year. Nothing is perfectly regular anymore so that is only a guess.

I know that this makes some feel uncomfortable. Oh well. We need more conversations on this topic and I am happy to open the door and make space for that. Yes, the quilt is a selfish reflection but it will serve as a larger conversation starter.

Expect the periodic post here and follow along on instagram with #perimenopausechroniclequilt.

Morning Make January 2021

January Morning Make 1.jpg

You know how people often start January with a Word of The Year? I admit that I’ve done it a few times. I also admit that I have forgotten my chosen word by March, every single year.

For Morning Make, then, I decided to think up a month’s worth or words to hammer home. All things I think are important for me to keep in mind. By drawing one our each day, doodling, really, I could spend some time to ruminate on the word for myself.

So that didn't really happen. I was doing these in the dark mornings on January in minimal light in the hopes the kids would stay asleep. I spent more time worried about font and lines and kerning and being unique each day than I did thinking about the word itself. Sigh.

January Morning Make 4.jpg

It turns out that my love of fonts and graphic design does not extend to the doing of it. I’ve read some stuff and enjoy looking at books and articles about font design and logos and all that stuff. While I never expected this to be easy nor for me to be any good at it as a beginner, I did not expect to dislike it. This was a slog, if I am being truly honest. I did not look forward to it each morning, I even felt stressed.

This is not the point of Morning Make!

Or so I thought. Truly, the point is to commit to the daily practice. The point is to experiment and play with something. Unless you try, you don’t know whether you will like it or not. The point is to show up and both challenge your creative juices and embrace the little tangents it wants to take you to.

It’s okay not to like it. I tell my quilt students that all the time. You don’t have to like what you made or event eh technique, but appreciate it all for the commitment to yourself and your play. This, this is the point of Morning Make.

January Morning Make 5.jpg

Since graphic design isn’t going to be a career choice for me (now I know!) it’s back to sewing for February.